What it cost to say Merry Christmas!

"Have this in mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, thanking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.  And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.  Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." Phil. 2: 5-11

Every Christmas carol, every reference to Christ this Christmas has brought a lump into my throat and tears to my eyes.  This has been a year of difficult change both joyful and mournful.  And yet no suffering or sacrifice we have faced as a family can compare with what Jesus did for us on the cross.  When all the noise is quieted in my soul, Christ silently, quietly, humbly ministers and reminds of His first coming among man so many years ago.  He is the Foundation of my faith, the Shepherd of my soul, the Adopter of my life.  I am His and He is mine and nothing can ever change that.

Change has happened in our family.  We went from a family of 4 that lived in NJ to a church planting family that sows the gospel in PA.  We went from 4 to 5 when the call came to adopt Eliot from Guatemala in 2007, and just a few months ago, in July 2011, 5 to 6 when Peter was adopted and brought home from Hong Kong.  Lots of joyful change.  

Poinsettia Show 2011 - Inglin Family Singers

But along with the joyful changes in our lives God mingled in some sorrowful ones as well.  My dear father-in-law went to be with Jesus on the 14th of July, 2011, one day before we got on a plane to pick-up Peter.  What a decision to have to make in an already tense God-ordained moment for our lives!  God wasn't done sanctifying us though.  He wasn't done bringing true and lasting gifts to us.  God wastes nothing and His timing is always fruitful and good.

December the 8th my Dad, George F. Goley III, was discovered dead in his home.  The phone call came in at 10:30 pm from my brother.  I wasn't ready for this announcement.  You see, my dad wasn't a Christian although I had presented the gospel to him many times, that last time being after Thanksgiving dinner this year.  During the Thanksgiving celebration, dad was able to spend time with his grandsons and thanks to Aunt Connie, we got pictures of dad holding them.  But did he cry out to Christ for mercy as the thief on the cross as he lay there dying?  I won't know for sure until the day of Jesus' second return.  That's what grieved my soul.  Was I a faithful daughter of the Most High God?  Did I take the opportunities given me to tell my dad about Jesus?  Were my prayers for dad laden with pleadings for salvation?  By God's grace, yes, but in the torment of my soul was this question, was it enough?

God answered that through the counsel of my adopted family, the body of Christ.  My pastors reminded me of the faithfulness of God and His mercy that even the criminal that hung next to Christ, that had no more options left to him except to die for his crimes, would be shown mercy.  For in the moments leading up to Christ's death the thief confessed sin, professed Christ and in love Christ held out the Kingdom of God to him.  Could this have happened to my dad as he lay dying alone on the floor of his bedroom?  There is reason for me to hope.  The gospel is the power unto salvation.  Nothing can stop the plans God has for us, not even death.  Jesus conquered death!

So like Christian, in Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress, the burden of all the what-ifs slipped off my back.  Jesus removed it.  What a precious gift this was!  It's His job to save.  He knows who will come and who won't.  He can even use weak attempts like mine of proclaiming the gospel to plant seeds in hardened hearts, like dad's.  He is the only one that can bring new life.   Peter is with us and having a great Christmas.  My father-in-law is truly celebrating Christmas for the first time face to face with Jesus, and perhaps even my dad. . . Ah, I so look forward to that day.  So saying Merry Christmas carried new weight this year for me.  Although my celebration of my Savior's birth is mixed with sorrow, it is none-the-less filled with joy.  It cost God everything for us to celebrate and for me to say, "Merry Christmas".  Jesus paid it all dear ones.

O Come let us adore Him,

O come let us adore Him,

O come let us adore Him

Christ The Lord!